What's new?

Haven't been typing lately.

Been spending most of my time writing my assignments. Actually I shouldn't blog cause there is an assignment due soon, but I needed to update everyone.

A lot of things happened in the past 2 months. However, most are trivial except for one.

I am single again. The 5-year relationship between my gf and me has ended.

I am not so badly affected this time, due to several factors. Namely, my pursue of a degree, takes away much of my free time and thus, I haven't had time to feel sad.

Secondly, knowing the reason this time, enables me to accept reality compared to the previous breakup.

I haven't been the best guy a girl can get, and I am not the most romantic and sensitive guy around. It doesn't help that I took her for granted and never improve on myself.

As many people know, it's hard to get along with me, especially when you are my gf. I am stubborn and opinionated, got a bad temper and easily irritated.

I am still pursuing my degree and my career path is not laid. I do not know where tomorrow takes me. How can I promise to take care of her for life?

I am happy for her that she left me. In fact, if she finds a better man, which I think she will, I would congratulate her with all my heart.

I don't deserve her and she deserves better.

There is just too much flaws in me, and I am a very pessimistic person, who brings people's mood down.

However, she is taking it hard, even when she initiated the breakup.

The truth is, she loves me with all her heart and soul.

I know it all along, but I have nothing that I can show her that I love her too. Not even the promise to marriage.

Throughout these years, she has been shedding endless amount of tears for me. Yet I always place her behind my friends.

I am a fool

It's too late to turn over a new leaf now. I had my chances and I blew them.

I wish her all the best, sincerely.

And I will always love her...